Nuts in Nederland

As my mother advised me at a young age, "You have to try a lot of different kinds of pies before you know what kind of pie you like", I dated a lot before I finally got married at age 30.

I had boyfriends from all different socio-economic backgrounds, ethnicities, religions and occupations. I've dated a preacher, a janitor, had boyfriends from seven different countries, dated guys much younger than me and one that was 11 years older. I've had relationships that were short-lived and some that lasted for years. I took my mother's advice and I played the field.

By the time I met Jeroen I was 25, working on my Master's degree and had managed to get myself into a lot of trouble and was working my way out of that black hole. He was first and foremost my best friend. He listened to my problems, read e-mails where I talked about going on dates and college athletic events, and he remained my friend long after I rejected him and chose another guy.

Yet through all the problems I continued to share and have, he never made me feel less than normal. Guys I had dated in my youth just never seemed to be able to listen to me and make me feel comforted. I always knew whoever I married would have to be my emotional rock.

Well, I married that emotional rock. Jeroen keeps me grounded. He knows me better than myself, which can be spooky sometimes. I often don't even have to finish a sentence, because he can already guess what's coming next. I only have to give him a certain look when we are mixed company, and he knows what's on my mind.

I love that we have our own code for certain events. That WTF night means we order Chinese or pizza and forget all other plans for dinner. That on Thanksgiving day we eat pizza and beer and then the Saturday following we have the whole turkey shin-ding with the fam.

I love being with someone who knows me from my darkest period, yet totally accepts me. He's met my family and casts no judgments. He thinks all their quirks make them interesting. I love that he is a part of my history and I don't have to explain myself to him. He was there and he was my best friend.

I am in love with my best friend and that's something I always wanted. I am flawed, I have my skeletons, and my mental defects, yet I have never felt inferior for these.

I am married to an intelligent, loving, grounded, and strong man. He's a wonderful father to our children and he works hard to make our marriage a team effort.

I tried a lot of pies in my life. All different kinds. Yet, in the end I found the RIGHT one. One that was totally unique and better than my expectations.

I have had my moments of frustration, like any couple, where he completely drives me mad. But isn't that part of marriage? Anyone you share your entire life with WILL drive you nuts. Just look at your kids! But, there's no one else I'd rather share my life with. Because in the end....HE GETS ME.